Turn Me On
5 Simple Rules to Sex Scenes
I've made it quite evident among my fans that the two things I love to write are action and sex. Two things that can be both very exhausting but also very fun to write. They both require a certain mood and the right pacing in order to create a great scene that draws the readers in and keeps them hooked. I always feel that those two kinds of scenes shape and epitomize your characters. Both sex and fighting cut deep to the bone and uproot emotions (or even lack there of) in the character and can show just what kind of person (or animal) they are.
Of course, they can also be one of the hardest things to write. I've had countless people ask me how I write my sex and fight scenes. I'm not going to touch on the action today (maybe another day?) but I compiled a few simple rules that I feel can assist in writing a hot and steamy sex scene that gets your panties and boxers wet.
Dim the Lights
Just like sex, it's all about the mood. Depending on the mood depends on how things follow and how the scene is going to turn out. You need to decide before you start fighting what kind of mood you're setting. Is it romantic? Is it kinky? Is it hot or is it emotional and filled with oodles of angst? Are our lovers saying goodbye or being reunited after a long separation Did they just meet our have they been together for years? These are important questions to ask yourself, because depending on the answers means what kind of scene will happen.
Two characters that are having a one night stand may not be able to get that perfect ebb and flow that two lovers who have been together for years have. It may be rough, messy, and filled with alcohol induced passion. On the other hand, two characters that know everything about one another's bodies may know the exact buttons to hit, or in another way may be going through a rough patch and be having troubles getting things to work.
Figure out what you want and start.
On a side note, I always find that it helps to play some "mood music" when I write. I select a playlist tailored to what I want, whether it kinky or emotional.
Language and Style
This goes for many things. You need to figure out what kind of sex is happening, whether it BDSM or pure vanilla (or anything in between). Once you got that and the mood set it's time to start writing. Language and style are important because it's one of the things that draws a reader in. If this is an emotional scene between two estranged lovers, you'll want to load on the depth. It won't be a wham, bam, thank you m'am.
A reader can't connect two the characters if they're brought to a sudden climax. The same goes for sex that's supposed to be heavy on the kink. Don't over do it with the floral descriptions.
Figure out what pertains to the scene and go with that. Just like with any kind of writing, you don't want to add too much or too little. It can ruin the scene and completely jar your reader out of the moment.
And we all want to get off, right?
Say My Name
While some may think this goes with language and style, this is completely different. I can not stress how important it is to be careful with your word selection. The wrong word can ruin a moment just as quickly as the wrong mood. Also be mindful of repetition and trite phrases.
Yes I know there are only so many words for "cock" but that doesn't mean you have to over do it. Don't turn around though and use some crazy description either. If I'd received a dollar for how many times I'd scene a member described in some off the wall way, I'd be a very rich person. All it does it make me go "what the fuck did I just read".
This applies to women as well. MY GOD! Women are worse then men. The things I've read about a woman's vagina.
Think about what would appeal to your readers, as well as what appeals to you. Don't go out of your comfort zone, but understand that you're trying to sell a scene here. What would you want to hear? Would you really want to hear a man whisper in your ear how he wants to pound your sacred flower? Or would you ever whisper to a man how you want to lick is joy stick?
Yeah, I didn't think so.
Please, please, choose your words wisely. The wrong word can destroy an entire scene.
Hard, Slow, or Sideways?
Now that you've got 1-3 figured out, it's time to set the pace. Just like sex, you want to set a pace that's realistic. If your characters are supposed to be having a tender moment, you don't want him in and out in three seconds flat, just as if they're drunk and groping at each other like two hormone-crazed teenagers, they aren't going to be doing a slow waltz.
Foreplay is a good way to figure out the pace. Does foreplay fit in? What kind? A little petting or a full body massage?
Are You a One-Minute Man or a Marathon Man?
Just like pace, keep in mind what kind of sex is happening. Be realistic about the scene. If it's an in and out job, it doesn't need to be stretched out. A few paragraphs could suffice Is it a simple blow job? That doesn't take two pages to describe. Then again, if your characters are going heavy on the foreplay or performing kink scenarios, then it's probably going to take a bit. Just be mindful of what is happening and how it would really happen to you.
The last thing you want is to bore your reader by over stretching the scene. Ask yourself as you're writing, does this make sense? Would this really happen? And you'll be able to set a decent length that will draw your readers in and see to it that your characters aren't the only ones having a good time.